a trip through recent thoughts

I've decided 17 years of age makes you an idiot. Don't worry I'm about to expound, just have to gather my thoughts in a way as to not offend people. just I have so many friends that are just being well idiots sorry i gave up on not offending people if you are then this blog is not for you click the next button now. Just how is it that a few months ago they all made sense they were in essence themselves. but now for several of them it's complete 180's like how can you knowingly make a choice you yourself know is bad and retarded for you to do and then still make it?! Don't get me wrong I've done it too but i've been talked out of alot more than i've actually acted upon. maybe i'm just too analytical and think things through to logically but i feel like they aren't thinking at all like they don't think ahead and it's just can you not see where you're going cause i'ts not that hard to see. I guess with most of them i'm not that frustrated but with like two or three it's the same idiotic choice over and over again! like they've been in the same situation and they know what happens when they make said stupid choice yet do it again! they do the same thing and expect different results which is infact insanity! but they don't seem to be driven insane by it only i am, maybe they're already insane and i'm just going down the path from sanity to insanity and that's why it bothers me so much? anyways i'm done ranting if any of you guys read this i love you all i just am confused but most of you know that already.

now happier news? I think yes. So for those that don't know much about me I am so indecisive and especially with one area of life and that's what i want to do with my life, Daily i find something new i want to do for a career i hate that in life you can really only do one career in depth. but here is probably my top ten career choices probably listed from most ridiculous to more realistic but we'll see it might just be random,

1. Rally car driver (yeah so what if i'm american it could happen)
2. stunt man/stunt driver
3. actor/celebrity goofball
4.president but the weirdest president we've ever had, world peace would be reached
5.bum (don't worry i'll explain more in depth after the list)
6. musician (i will also explain)
7. gay jobs such as interior design, stylist (ditto to previous parentheses)
8. professor/high school teacher
9.  psychologist/therapist
10. doctor/ surgeon (9, 10 are what i seriously plan on but the others sound more fun but yeah those are tied i'm not sure which i'd rather be)
11. photographer ( sorry couldn't cut it down to ten)

Ok so explanations so being a bum while it's more of a lifestyle not a career is at least to me rather glamorous, think about it you go wherever you want whenever the only time you have to stop is to bum some money or just go to home depot and pick up some odd jobs for people that way it's more predictable income and well legal. but yeah it'd be so fun to just travel no responsibility just doing what you want and not having a bunch of "things" to carry around and be attached to. musician well one i love music and two a musician is really a fancy word for bum who travels the world cause well they don't actually do much but they get paid may not be well always but still. ok gay jobs lets put it this way i'm you're gay straight friend, the guy that will go shopping with you tell you what looks good and is stylish and such but will still date you and kiss you, i just enjoy interior design cause well i'm picky about how things especially houses look, now stylist this is actually new, today in fact. but while getting my hair cut i realized how much fun it would be well not to do guys hair that would be boring.... but to do girls hair would be sooo fun, something you should know i love playing with hair so being paid for it would be fun, but more so like making a woman feel gorgeous about herself would just feel so good and doing that everyday? yeah awesome right? just seeing how excited this woman in there got with the person cutting her hair i got all excited and that'd be so fun to take part in but yeah anyways gay moment check! (to maren who i'm sure is going to read this sometime sorry i forgot to tell you about the stylist thing i kinda forgot about it until i started writing this but yeah i'm sure you'll appreciate this haha)

anyways thank you for reading my friends or the lack there of
-sincerely a straight gay man

Somethings suck

So basically sometimes in life you never expect things to happen but they do, good or bad. Sometimes its unclear which something is, it's often the hardest when a situation is like that. Sometimes holdin on to what you want is the worst thing you can do. I think I have been doing that lately when maybe I should just back off and leave it alone, thats what most people seem to think anyways they always have. I am trying it finally but it's hard and i don't know if it's right but I guess we'll see. I am sorry I never wanted this to be how things are but it seems to e what everyone wants.

Excavation of my mouth and the littlest things

So today I got my wisdom teeth out the doctor wanted sone pearly whites and well he struck pay gums. The place was called utah surgical arts so i'd like to believe that my teeth are now a part of some abstract modern art sculpture making a statement about sooety no one understands. Or maybe just part of the eiffel tower or the leaning tower of pisa thatll do doc thatll do It was pretty great loved the going under feels so relaxing, tue surgery itself went well. Well I assume it went well cause I have four lovely holes in this mouth of mine. But in all reality I suppose I dont know that it went well. Anyways I woke up and was good to go but they made me ride in a wheelchair which bugged me cause I hate riding in one when I can walk just fine. I can feel my face again which is great took some loratab and I'm feeling great but it's not really that, that made me feel so good it's just well the little things....

It's amazing to me te healing power a friend can have, just coming to visit you bringing with them a smile that melts your heart, just resting her head on your shoulder, holding your hand with her tiny little hands thT are just te best. I felt so much better after that visit nothing big happened but the greatest things are truly just te little things holding hands, a tight hug and getting a kiss on the cheek :) thank you for all the little things I'm on top of the world!


Thanks for listening my readers or the lack thereof have a great night love you all

Dads new job and today

So yesterday we found out that my dad dies indeed have the new job in north Dakota. We've spent the last few days getting him already for the job and time away from home. We had to switch his Phone to Verizon so I was lucky enough to inherate his old iPhone which is actually what I'm using to write this haha I kinda love it. But it is going to be hard not to see him for such long periods of time but it's such a great job too good to pass up. I know that god will be watching over him as well as us during the times he's gone.

Anyways today, so my fan went to see hp7 while I watched Braxton cause he doesn't sit through movies so well. We began our adventure at the university mall specifically the Disney store where we spent like an hOur haha it was so fun and so cute to see him get so excited about all the fun stuff. The next exciting event would have to be Tucanos. We went there for dads last meal of sorts, it was so delicious but I ate way tOo much I almost lost it in the barhroom. But man that is such a fun experience.

Anyways the rest if the day was pretty stressful just getting all the last minute stuff ready and I must say I am kind of scared but it's gonna be fun and exciting I do love change it's a good thing typically. Anyways thanks for letting me tell you about my day you're al awesome
Sincerely one rather impressed with his iPhone typing skills

one of those silly facebook notes

so i decided i should blog about something and i saw a facebook note thingy that seemed interesting so i'm going to do that and hey maybe you'll get to know me a bit better

LAYER ONE: On the Outside-- 

Full Name: Braden Matthew Messick
Birthday: Oct. 11
School: THS 
Major: Philosophy maybe, undecided 
Current Location: that's classified but i am behind a computer
Eye Color: brown green hazel?
Hair Color: brown
Righty or Lefty: lefty for life babies
Zodiac Sign: a cock for the chinese and then the one i think it means i am a libra at least that's what google says

LAYER TWO: On the Inside-- 

Your Heritage: german and other white places

Your Fears: elevators 

Weakness: babies

Goal(s): i've scored like 5 yeah i'm basically a super star

Regrets: only one but you have to be special to know it

Change one thing about your life: said regret 

Relieve Stress: drive walk music

Hardest thing ever dealt with: a long break up

What upsets you: slurping bleh sooooo nasty

Vent about something: I just gah i hate misquitos they take my blood and make me itchy and just grrrr gah it itches! i fed them is that not enough????! must they make me itch too?!!!


LAYER THREE: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow-- 

Your thoughts first waking up: midnight showing still so worth it hp7.2 baby

Your most missed memory: how things were like a month and a half ago, or perhaps the beach  

LAYER FOUR: You’re picking-- 

Pepsi or Coke: pepsi between those too

McDonald's or Burger King: mcds, bk makes me sick

Single or Group dates: some of both :)

Chocolate or Vanilla: chocolate is that a question?

LAYER FIVE: Do You-- 

Do Drugs: nope not unless directed to take them by a medical pro

Have a crush: very much so but it might be unrealistic of me 

Think you've been in love: totally

Want to get married: very much so

Believe in yourself: what am i doing? but usually yes

LAYER SIX: In the Past Month-- 

Gone to the mall: yes i did yesterday in fact

Eaten Sushi: no it makes me sick

Gone skating: no not in a long time

Dyed your hair: never ever in my life should i?

Done something exciting: psh i do that everyday!

LAYER SEVEN: Have You Ever?-- 

Changed who you were to fit in: not really if i don't fit in i usually don't want to

Stole a note that you weren't tagged in: hahahahaha um prime example right here

LAYER EIGHT: Getting Old-- 

Age you're hoping to be married: if i'm not married by 30 i'll be sad i think 23 but we'll see what happens after the mission

Age you're hoping to have children: i'd like to at 25 but it's really up to my dear sweet wife she has to do the hard part

Want to travel to: EVERYWHERE 


LAYER NINE: Perfect Mate-- 

Best Eye Color: i love blue eyes but it doesn't really matter

Best Hair Color: Anything but i'd prefer not blonde

Short or Long Hair: depends on the girl :)

LAYER TEN: What were you doing-- 

5 MINUTES AGO: writing this i'm getting distracted 

1 HOUR AGO: reading someones blog

1 DAY AGO: HARRY POTTER 7!!!!!!!

1 YEAR AGO: something summery :)


LAYER ELEVEN: Finish the Sentence-- 

I Love: you :)
I Feel: like i should pause and go pee.....
I Hate: being chased by rapid dingos with buttons for eyes (it happens alot)
I Hide: Because of those d@mn dingos! 
I Miss: it would embarrass her if i said her name on my blog i think
I Need: a hug cause i want a hug


Well there you have it buddies :) hope you enjoy!

a blog post

So i don't really know what to write about i just feel like i should cause it's been awhile. So my cousin andy just got back from his mission and tomorrow is his homecoming thing i'm pretty excited but not at the same time it's just a very long drive.
The past three days have been pretty amazing but i don't know they've left me feelin kinda down for some reason. you ever just wish you could freeze time so you could think everything through before you had to choose something? I especially wish i could right now cause i know i have to choose something but i'm not even sure what it is, well i do i just don't know exactly what it is. Sorry that makes absolutely no sense unless you know me and how i describe things which is probably only like 2 people in the whole world. Gah i hate not knowing everything that's stressing me out but today it's alot of unknowns.
I did go on a run and it really helped me clear my head and think things through it was so helpful and helped mend some stupid stuff, i'm glad that parts behind and i'm looking forward to the new beginnings.
You ever get a text and pray that its from someone specific but it never seems to be the one you need to talk to when you need to? haha then you get some that break your heart that you didn't really expect them too. life should come with a map.... though i probably still wouldn't use it.
Well thanks for listening i know i'll blaze a path that makes sense looking back but sadly you have to blaze it looking forward and well i feel lost and confused in the denseness of life haha oh well you only get one might as well embrace the chaos and confusion and call it yours
-sincerely one going no where in particular

trapped inside

trapped inside, a photo by bradenm777 on Flickr.

So i've decided on a project to do, i want to take pictures of someones eye and then a picture of them expressing an emotion/doing something/ whatever they want to express themselves. then put them inside their eye. it's not the most original idea ever but i think it's pretty cool still. so if you would be ok with me doing that to you let me know :) comment on here or contact me by emailing me bradenm777@gmail.com even if you don't know me if you'd be ok with it i'd love to thank you my loyal readers/future models or the lack thereof
-sincerely "a sad strange little man"
p.s. not that i'm an angery person or a murder i just thought that might look cool in an eye and it allowed me to really use the name "trapped inside" for this project now i just need to capture other things trapped inside haha whatever it may be